pshhhh pshhhh pshhhh pshhhh

I had my first prenatal visit today!
I was soooooo hoping they would do a sonogram so I could see this little being, but no such luck. I guess I should view that as a good thing since they usually only do sonos this early if there is a problem. She said everything appeared normal (other than my wickedly wild normal nausea)

The nurse did get the doppler out to look for a heartbeat! She looked for quite awhile, and I was beginning to think maybe we wouldn't get to hear one, when......
pshhhh pshhhh pshhhh pshhhh!!! There it was! Baby heartbeat!!! It was the most beautiful sound!!! I of course cried, which made James laugh. Then I laughed, and couldn't stop, so that was the end of the baby noise! They're going to do another listen at my next visit - and I think we'll take the video camera so everyone can hear it!

It still seems so hard to believe all of this, but hearing the heartbeat made it a lot more real - still not sure it will 100% sink in until I feel it moving or until I see the sono. Maybe not even until it is born!

Craziness.......
I couldn't be happier.

7 weeks, 4 days

So, as it turns out the lovely episode of puke-age that I blogged about last time was a wicked case of food poisoning (thanks to the old turkey that I ate).

However, I have been battling morning sickness pretty well since then. I am 7 weeks and 4 days right now, which puts me smack in the middle of morning sickness territory. It sucks. I am almost always nauseated, and have to try and remember to eat - and I am almost always hungry because I hardly ever eat because I hate puking. The nausea overrides the hunger and I just force enough down to curb both the hunger and the nausea. Apparently, milk is my best friend. A cup of milk satisfies me for a good hour or so. After which, I usually jump up and run to my porcelain friend that I have seen way too much of lately.

Right now, my husband is forcing me to go out to eat with him - let's see if I can keep it down. Or even get it down.

All-Day-and-Night Sickness

So I was really hoping I might be in the 25% population that doesn't get morning sickness (since I somehow made the cut into the <1% of people that don't have wisdom teeth!)

Well- I got the answer to that question today (although I am still not 100% sure...I am also considering that I have food poisoning [bad me - I ate Turkey that had been in the fridge too long], or some sort of bug [given that I have a temperature]).
I started out having wickedly-horrible heartburn on the way home from work (pretty typical for me). I took some TUMS, but it did not go away. Took a couple more when I got home along with my daily Zantac (which I think I'm going to change because I don't think it's doing much).

Went to sleep around 9am and tossed and turned until around 11am when I got up and proceeded with the puking - which lasted roughly until 10pm. I was debating going to the emergency room (I have NEVER had heartburn that bad), but decided to call my OB's office instead. The doc on call told me that the severe heartburn is not uncommon - especially since I have been throwing up all day. He prescribed an anti-nausea medication for me. I didn't choke one down until about 9:15 - because I didn't think I could keep it down. Slept fitfully for about an hour and woke up at least not wanting to puke up my other lung...(I think my first one came out earlier). Still have wicked bloating, and in addition to all of my continuing pelvic and abdominal discomfort (thanks Endo!), I now have super sore abs due to my puke-fest.

Such a pathetic creature am I. I hate it.

just an update...

I'm feeling very well. I'm due August 28th which is going to make August a super crazy month (even more than now).

So far...
August 7th - my sister-in-law's birthday
August 11th- my nephew's birthday
August 12th - my sister-in-law 's birthday
August 19th - my husband's birthday
August 23rd - our anniversary

My due date is in August, and my brother's baby is due in August as well.

We're not going to find out the gender, and we're not revealing any possible baby names which is driving everyone crazy, but oh well! This is what we want!

I took another pregnancy test today because I was starting to feel unsure, given that so many people know now! We told my parents this morning, called James' father this morning and called his mum the day we found out.

It's still overwhelming and I still can't believe it. Had no remote idea it would only take one month trying. Wow. I doubt I'll believe it until I see it on a Sonogram - or more likely - when it actually comes out ---- which reminds me that I am TERRIFED of giving birth!

Still so happy................

overjoyed

I just had a feeling. I got home from work this morning and told James I was going to take a pregnancy test. He asked me why. I knew it was likely to be negative, but I just had to know for sure. I knew if it was negative, that I could still BE pregnant as well.
Well, to make a long story short, the test told me very quickly that I was indeed pregnant. I had another type of test - a digital one - and also assured me that the two lines I had seen on the other test were correct. I AM PREGNANT!
I cried for a good 10 minutes with tears of joy (and a bit of shock as well). Wow. Now I'm scared of giving birth...haha. Curious to know if it's a boy or a girl...although we're not going to find out what it is until the birth itself. Nervous and so very excited. I have to work tonight, and sleep is just not coming to me.

yay?

So...I just went off to the bathroom and discovered a bit of pink. Initially I was very sad, thinking that the notorious Aunt Flo is just around the corner. However, after searching online, I learned that a bit of pink can be seen about a week after suspected ovulation (which I am about 9 days out) as the noted implantation bleeding. This sent both me and James into huge smiles and optimistic cheer. We should know for sure around Christmas.........

Hopeful

In the last 72 hours, I have learned that not only is my little brother going to be a father again (number 2 for them), but that one of my friends is going to have her fourth baby. I can't tell you how happy I am for the both of them - but also a tad jealous.

Both of these were unplanned (not unwanted). I can't help but be jealous - since right now I want more than anything to have the opportunity to be a mother. And, I am still not sure if I am going to be able to achieve that dream. I have completely moved from super pessimistic about my ability to procreate to potentially entirely too optimistic. I have everything crossed right now that the planets will line up, and I will have good news in a couple weeks.

Despite me convincing myself that no one would find out for eight weeks (to reduce the possibility of the heartache of telling people I've miscarried), I have selfishly informed enough people that we're trying - so much that I now have a short list of people to tell whether or not Aunt Flo arrives in two weeks.

It's hard to not get optimistic about this possibility - and my husband constantly depresses me with bringing me back to the reality that in all likelihood - I am NOT pregnant. In my optimistic stupor, however - I continue to be hopeful that in two weeks I will be able to report good news. Otherwise, I will probably cry myself into another fetal position due to my overwhelming ability to get my hopes up too high.

I guess we'll see.