tank.

We had to feed Charlotte a bottle again. I just cried and cried. I am so scared my milk supply is going to drop off and I won't be able to breastfeed for a year like I hope to.
I dashed off to the store to buy oatmeal (which can increase milk production) and a bottle of Fenugreek - which is a herb that can stimulate milk production as well. I am desperate, and so hoping that this works!

tank?

I haven't blogged in awhile. I should have, but as always, I haven't.

I had to feed Charlotte a bottle for the first time tonight. She completely drained both sides of me and was demanding more. She was extremely overtired and just needed to eat to push her over the edge. *sigh*
James thawed out some of my very early transitional milk (from when Charlotte was 5 days old) ... it needed to be used anyway.

I just cried. I have been feeling like my supply is dropping lately, but this was a confirmation that it is indeed dropping. I am going to start doing what I can to increase it. I'm not sure what I can do, but I will do any and every thing that I can.

rock n roll

We had our first visit from our Parents as Teachers rep today, and while she was here, Charlotte rolled from her back to her tummy for the first time! Such a big girl!!!
I can't believe how big she is getting! She is doing so much and is so busy. It's so much fun to see her learning about her world and growing and developing.

She is truly a miracle, and while she is incredibly frustrating at times, I can't imagine life without that beautiful girl.

relief ...

One line.

I had convinced myself that I would see two.

And then I was a bit sad.






I am indeed relieved, because I am definitely not ready for another one yet, although based on my *sad* reaction ... I am now thinking if a whoops happened, I would be okay with it, rather than annoyed. Overwhelmed, but okay.

paranoia

Not that it's even possible, but I am now a bit paranoid that Sprout part 2 could be on the way ...

I've been exceptionally nauseous for days, I don't want to eat cheese, and I've had rampant heartburn. I had convinced myself it was nothing, but it keeps grating at me, and now I need to POAS to see if this is even possible. I hope it's nothing and I'm freaking myself out, because I am sooooo not ready for another one. I *think* I want more kids down the road, but right now, I am not ready. WE are not ready. We need a bit more of a stable (read: more space) living arrangment, and I think James and I have a bit of work to do before we need to add another child to the mix. This, of course, assuming that I can actually control these things and when they happen.

I'm going to the store on my way home from work. I'll have my answer soon enough.

I better only see one line.

here is thumbkin

Charlotte finally discovered her thumb!
She has been sucking on her fist for a couple weeks now, but today managed to find and suck on her thumb several times! Hopefully this is one step closer to saying goodbye to Mr. Binky. I certainly don't mind if she is a binky girl (heck, I was one), but it'd be easier if we don't have to deal with a mini-tragedy every time the binky falls out of her mouth.

Otherwise, she is becoming such a wonderful baby. She is happy almost all of the time, rarely cries because she is tended to very quickly. Still nurses great and is allowing us to put her down more and more rather than needing to be held all the time.

I miss her so much when I'm at work, but it's good for us to have some time apart, I think. I'm so attached to her, I think it's healthier for me to be away from her than vice versa, but she is very much a momma's girl right now, so it's good that she gets some daddy time.

diflucan

I broke down and took Charlotte to the doctor tonight about her rash & thrush. She's been on both the cream and the oral Nystatin for a week and it's helped, but it's still present, and I want to see results.
He prescribed her some oral diflucan to add to the nystatin which we're supposed to keep using. He said her thrush didn't look that bad. I guess he knows what he's talking about.

Hopefully we can get somewhere with this. I'm tired of disposable diapers. They do not hold in atomic blowout baby poo.